Hi! I know it’s been awhile since our paths have crossed. I’m glad to have bumped into you today. My day today is a hard day on this journey to destiny. I’m sandwiched between yet another birthday and St. Valentine’s Day, both of which are emotional for me since I’m ‘still single.’ It’s not that I think being single is a bad thing. No, there are a lot of pluses to being single. My time is my own. I am responsible only for myself. To a degree. We are all responsible to each other since we share this place called ‘life.’ But as for the daily needs, I’m on my own.
Well, if being single isn’t the problem, what is this heaviness I feel on my heart? I miss him. Yep, that’s right. I miss him. You see, I have been praying for that special man, whoever he may be, for over 17 years now. Yes, you may think I am crazy, but I gave the selection of my husband over to my L-RD, and I trust Him to work everything out. Oh, there have been many times I have tried to work it out myself, but that just doesn’t work! And so I keep turning the desire over to my L-RD…and wait. The waiting is the hardest, because, you see, most days I know he’s real. I know the L-RD is the One who gives us, His children, the desires of our hearts. To me this means not only that He gives us what we want, but when submitted to Him, He places desires within our hearts. I’ve definitely given this desire over to the L-RD. Several times in fact. I’ve tried killing him (the husband) off even. More than once! But my L-RD keeps resurrecting him. The desire for him. That’s why he’s become so real to me.
And so, another birthday has come and gone. I’m 44 now, and have never been married. You do know that L-RD, right? That I’m 44, and birthing babies doesn’t come easy to women my age. That’s another desire that has been place upon my heart to have children, both natural and adopted. Therefore I wait. And pray. And follow the signs that the L-RD, in His compassion, has put upon my path, pointing me in the direction that I must follow in order to intersect with that special someone. The one my heart is drawn towards.
So, my love, whoever you may be, I send you this Valentine, an excerpt taken from a song by Mandisa and Chris August titled ‘Praying for You’…
I wonder if you think of me…like I think of you.
Do you long for my touch?
Baby, I know that you’ll be the one that’s strong,
When I am weak.
I’ll love you through the good and the bad,
For rich or for poor.
May not have much, but this I’m sure:
‘til my dream comes true,
I’ll be praying for you…
Oh, I wonder what’s in store for me,
Who you’re gonna be.
Have you ever passed me by?
But for now, I’m waiting…
Anticipating
I’ll be praying that you will fear the L-RD.
I’ll pray we’ll be on one accord,
That G-D will bless everything we do.
I pray that He will shield your heart,
That we will not be torn apart,
And side by side in Jesus’ name we’ll stand.
But for now we’re waiting…
Anticipating!
